Every day isa new day, hoping something interesting will happen. Something will change, change is constant and constancy itself embeds change in it. Not sure, whether this philosophy is in real life, but the reality is, that I wonder, what I was taught as a child, and am changing everyday as I learn to become an adult. Perspectives of my life has changed from what I was, when I moved to austin at 25. Believed in certain things, taht things have to be done in a certain way, life should move in a certain way. Making all A's was my goal, but when I had one defeat, I relalized, wow,how does that feel, a blow to self-esteem eh?
Not sure, why and how did that happen? Sometimes, it is hard to judge, what goes around you and why for what reason?? At 27 when i faced my own hardships, I learned to come out of it, and had to fix everything by myself. I wonder whether that makes me a stronger person or a weaker one?? When you are sheltered too much within the boundaries of families, and when you get scrwed around or maybe I should say, you trust someone and fall, it gets difficult day by day then,w hen all you do is put all your eggs in one basket, when you trust one person and that person is your world, but for that person, you are just a toy, maybe an object of display? When that person is not attached to you and you have given your life to that person, and that person takes you for granted??? Wonder how that feels like...
Sometimes, in life, willing to change for someone who really doesnt have the same reciprocation, it is amazing, how things happen, how life twists and turns. ha! Never knew what difficulties were, but when they came, how they say it pours when it rains, taht is what happened!
Living every day of my life trying to juggle wiht school, exams random thoughts, people around me, socialization, insecurities, finances, arggh... too much on the list to do and too less time!
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